Exploding Moments

"Astonishment is that state of the soul, in which all its motions are suspended, with some degree of horror." Edmund Burke, On the Sublime, 1757

The Paintings in The Accident Series depict a lone figure, isolated, on a stark white background, in the midst of a horrific accident. The subject, always a male, passively and perhaps complacently looks on. Jung described his own near death experience as an affirmation of things as they are: an unconditional “yes” to that which is. He said there is no guarantee – not for a single moment – that we will not fall into error or stumble into deadly peril.

Trauma often affects the ability to connect with others and to feel connected to one’s own body. The paintings in The Accident Series represent the completion of an ego death. What appears to be destroyed is actually in the process of becoming.

Perception of time is radically altered during an emergent or life-threatening moment. During trauma, time exists on a dream-like plane and we can appear detached, hyper-rational, indifferent. The images in The Accident Series freeze and unfreeze time, flipping between the occurrence of the accident and the aftermath. The velocity with which the paint is transferred onto the canvas also communicate action and time, frozen and unfrozen.

I paint from life, from what is observable, transferring what I see in front of me onto the canvas without judgment. Staging the accidents is a challenge for both my model and me. There is hilarity but also discomfort, and the great disquiet of inexplicable glee. We surrender to it, so often overcome by paroxysms of laughter we can hardly get through the session.